Tuesday, 23 February 2010

I suck

I just completely destroyed my lent with a massive binge, I had done so well for a week, im super pissed off now. Im not purging, because the last time i did it there was blood in it, so im not doing that, which means i am going to put a load of weight on after today! I was fine up until lunchtime then i made lunch and from there i just lost control, i kept going back into the kitchen to get more and more, it was gross. The attitude was well ive already fucked up might as well carry on. The binge from what i can remember included:

6 Mini Pitta's
4 Crackers
2 Rocky Biscuit Bars
2 Chewy cereal bars
1 Fruity cereal bar
3 Ginger cream biscuits
Golden Syrup
1 Slice of bread
A bowl of alpen

I think that was it. Gross. Unneccesary. For this I am starting over Lent tomorrow, I will have to do the whole week over again. Plus more rules. Now I will stick to eating 3 meals a day with one morning snack at 11 and one afternoon snack at 4. I will not be allowed to eat anything after 7. Oh also, Im not eating anything with palm oil in it, Ive just watched this panorama program on palm oil industry and it is horrific what is happening in Borneo, so I have stopped eating anything with that in.

Im so annoyed, I just feel like I am going backwards all the time. January was great but February has truly sucked. I haven't been able to exercise either, because I've been really sick since having yellow fever jab.

Tomorrow starts a new day and a new me, the goal will be 1,100 calories, No going over. Cant wait to start over.


  1. I hope you feel better soon. That's a long time to feel sick. :'( What is hellow fever jab?

  2. Im going travelling to south america at the end of april, and you have to have a yellow fever jab to go there. its a live vaccination, and it has nasty side effects, of which i have been unfortuante enough to get :( x

  3. I understand! so many times i have continued to binge because i held that mentality " i messed up, may as well keep going..."
    but i know you can do it!
    feel better!

  4. yikes, i know it sucks to get stuck in a binge because of how awful you feel after. but it'll get better and that binge won't matter anymore. i hope you feel better fast. cheer up, stay strong, we're on your side.